13 months on this crazy planet with us, and you finally said MaMa - or something that closely resembled that. After responding "yes, dear" after every utterance of your new word, I realized that you were actually asking for a Mum Mum (a rice cracker you can not eat enough of), and are not referring to me at all. Bummer. You're still cute, though.
This month two really important things happened. #1. Your hair finally grew long enough to wrangle into pigtails, and #2. You crawled up a flight of stairs for the first time. The first achievement is important to me because whenever I pictured having a little girl when I was pregnant, that little girl always had pigtails. Even though I have to bribe you with cartoons to get you to stay still long enough to achieve the style, it's worth it. Between the dimples, the space between your top teeth, and now your spiky little palm tree pigtails, I could just eat you up with a spoon. Cutie-patootie! Now, the second achievement is important in a different way. While visiting your Gramma and Papa Jack, you walked right over to their basement stairs, and started making your way up all by yourself. Natural progression right? Sure, except you'd never in your life had access to stairs to practice your technique before showing it off to the word. We live in a one level apartment where the closest thing you have to stairs to practice on is a step stool. While you are quite the independent woman (throw your hands up at me), this is the first physical feat you have accomplished without some sort of coaching or coaxing from Daddy or I. I was just amazed, as you climbed that mountain of stairs all "no biggie" like. My thoughts during those three minutes veered back and forth from "yay, you're doing it all by yourself!" to "sniff, sniff, you're doing it all by yourself without me" several times. By the time your little pigtailed head made it all the way to the top, and you turned around and smiled that sweet gap toothed smile, I was firmly on Team Gracie Master Stair Climber.
I was looking forward to this month since January when I went back to work because I would be home with you for a whole week during my Spring Break! I had so many plans for us. We were going to bake cookies, finger paint, visit the library, and wrap up the week spending a long weekend in Michigan with your grandparents. I had visions of this being the absolute best mother/daughter week ever. Well, you know what they say about best laid plans, right? So, of course you got sick, and of course none of our fun activities (except for the visit to Michigan) took place. You were hot and achy and uncomfortable. All you wanted to do was lay in my arms on the couch or in bed and watch cartoons or read books. And, Gracie, that's what we did. Although I was sad that we didn't create a finger paint masterpiece worthy of filling that blank space on the living room wall, I was so thankful to have the time that I did to spend with you. I was thankful that I was able to spend hours rocking you and singing to you until you were able to find a few moments of restful sleep. I was thankful that I was able to get a few tired giggles out of you by balancing various toys on my head. I was thankful to just be there in that moment with you - sick or not. I have always had a problem with creating impossibly high standards for myself. Every night out with my girlfriends needs to create a new inside joke. Every concert I attend needs to have the best set list ever. Every run I finish needs to leave me feeling energized like I can conquer the world. Every lesson plan I put together needs to include something completely out of the box and innovative. This has spilled over into how I approach motherhood, just ask Daddy, but I like to think I've got it under control a little bit better now. I've felt disappointed more than I probably should have in my life, but as our spring break to do list laid on the counter with nothing checked off on it, what I felt was completely opposite from disappointment.
I mentioned earlier that we made a trip to Michigan to see your Gramma and Papa Jack. You always have such a good time at their house. There are always a million people stopping by and a million things to do, and you just play and show off until you physically can not play and show off any longer. During this visit, you had butter on your toast for the first time, which I admit I totally overreacted about. Gramma was nice enough to make you breakfast and manage your morning routine while Daddy and I got some much needed extra sleep. I am a mean mom and make you eat dry toast at home, but I'm pretty sure that small amount of butter did not put you on the road to childhood obesity that I've always obsessed about. That doesn't mean I started buttering your toast at home, but I'm cutting Gramma a break. The extended weekend included Easter which meant you got all dolled up in a beautiful pink dress and behaved wonderfully at church. Well, the first part of that statement is true. This is the trip when you also decided to give up sleeping in the car. So, guess who got to sit in the back and entertain you for five hours both ways? If you guessed Daisy, you are wrong. She was very comfortable napping in the front passenger seat like the princess that she is. We read books, we played with finger puppets, I dreamed about the glass of wine that was waiting for me at the end of the trip, and finally I gave in and let you watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse on my laptop. I'm loving this age where you have no idea you watch the same 20 minute show three times in a row. I'm sure this era will die a horrible death just like the era of moving cars make you sleep for hours and hours upon end.
This month a little spark come out in you. You started to make your opinion known a little more and you made it known a lot louder. I'm nervous to see where this leads. Thirteen months going on thirteen years it seems like. You're probably already thinking in your little brain, "Ugh, you don't know everything, Mooooom." You're right, honey, I don't. I just know that I continue to be amazed by everything little thing that you do.
xoxo
Momma
p.s. We did manage to make some homemade biscuits during the Spring Break from hell. Look at how excited you were!
