The Adventure

Do any of you guys have a theme song?  A song that you imagine playing when you walk into the room sort of like an MMA fighter walking into the ring?  Once while still in Texas, B and I had friends over to watch an MMA fight.  After a few drinks, we went around the room and had to pick our theme song that we would walk into the ring to.  I'm pretty sure I picked "The Final Countdown" by Europe (c'mon - such a good song), and a few others picked some heavy metal stuff or rap.  Then, it was B's turn, and he picked..."Dancing Queen" by ABBA.  The entire room erupted into laughter, and he had some sort of explanation, but to this day, I still hear "see that girl, watch that scene, diggin' the dancing queen" in my head sometimes when he enters a room. 

Funny stories aside, I rediscovered my theme song last night while cooking dinner.  iTunes was playing on random, and "The Adventure" by Angels and Airwaves came on.  I think I screamed "this is my jam" and turned it way up and maybe proceeded to sing the lyrics at the top of my lungs.  Then, I remembered all the life events that I can connect to this song, and went into full flashback mode for a few minutes.

#1 - Booking a last minute flight to surprise B in Austin (I was still living in Chicago) - 2006
I blasted this song in my bedroom while throwing bathing suits and suntan lotion into a suitcase.  This was the moment I knew we were meant to share our lives together, and I was going to stop at nothing to make it happen.
Relevant lyrics:  "I can not live, I can't breathe, Unless you do this with me"

#2 - Making the big move from Chicago to Austin - 2006
With the Chicago skyline in the side mirror of my U-Haul truck, I blasted this song and embarked on a cross country journey that would change my whole life.
Relevant lyrics:  "Hey oh here I am, And here we go, Life's waiting to begin"

#3 - Marrying the man of my dreams - 2009
I jammed to this song in the shower on the morning of B and I's wedding.  I may have stayed in a few minutes longer than necessary just to hear it three times.  Sorry to those bridesmaids who didn't have hot water when it was their turn - I'm sure you didn't mind :-)
Relevant lyrics:  "Any type of love it will be showed, Like every single tree reach for the sky, If you're gonna fall, I'll let you know, That I will pick you up, Like you for I"

#4 - My first day in the classroom after making the decision to abandon my current career and pursue teaching - 2010
This song was on repeat on my ipod after that first glorious day in the classroom.  After working in advertising (which never sat well with my values and morals), you could say I was just a little jaded about the world.  All it took was one day in a Kindergarten classroom to open my eyes and awaken my soul and creative spirit.
Relevant lyrics:  "Even if your hope has burned with time, Anything that is dead shall be regrown, And your vicious pain - your warning sign, You will be fine"

#5 - We're having a baby! - 2011
The first morning after the positive pregnancy test, I couldn't stop listening to this song.  What an adventure we were about to embark on!  Suddenly, all of the lyrics spoke to me at once and danced around in my head and heart. 

Hey baby, and here we go, life's waiting to begin!

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, Daddy and I LOVE music - everything from Rock and Folk to the Red Dirt Road Country we grew to love in Texas.  I, myself, grew up on a steady diet of The Highwaymen, Michael Jackson, Waylon Jennings, tunes from Godspell and West Side Story, and Guns N Roses.  Some of my best memories of being a child involve listening to music with my parents - Roy Orbison in my dad's truck, and Tom Petty in my mom's van.  Please don't ask me to play Kidz Bop, or anything juvenile like that in the car.  In your room, you can listen to whatever your heart desires, but the car is your parents' domain, and we will take the time that you are strapped into that seat in the back to school you on good music.  That's just how it's done in the F household!

Smile, though your gums are aching...

B and I had dentist appointments this morning, and I am sad to say that I was not the VIP in today's contest of "best teeth in the F household".  We always go on the same day and have the same hygienist and dentist check out our teeth, and then they give us the down and dirty.  Today, I won the homecare contest because I brush and floss more often than B does, but I lost the overall war because  I HAD TWO CAVITIES!  What?!  I told the dentist it was probably from all that throwing up I did during the first 5 months of my pregnancy, and he laughed and then said that while that might not be the exact cause, being pregnant can cause dental issues for sure.  Something about the baby leaching all the calcium and other stuff you need for good teef n gums and leaving mama with very little.  So, THANKS A LOT, BABY!!!!

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, I'm sorry.  I didn't mean to yell at you, and I promise to never blame my dental issues on you again.  On the bright side, your future best friend was born on Wednesday.  Say hello to Austin:

This is my best friend in the whole word's little boy.  I've only seen his picture and I am head over heels in love with him.  Baby, I can't wait until that is you all wrapped up in a blanket sweetly sleeping.  Only six weeks to go. 

"Uhhhh are you ok?"

Last night I was sitting in class around 8:30 PM, snacking on a granola bar, and trying to pay attention to something boring my baby hating prof was droning on and on about.  I could tell that the boy (man?  He's probably in his 20s - I never know when to make the jump to terms like man and woman) sitting next to me was staring at me.  I went through my usual checklist of what could be causing this extended gaze in my direction.

1.  Do I have a booger?  (Slyly used the glare on my laptop screen to check - clear)
2.  Is there food on my face?  (Did a quick swipe with my hand - clear)
3.  Did the prof ask me a question and I am totally oblivious and everyone is waiting for me to answer?  (Tune into prof - she is still blabbering about the evils of grade equivalent scores on standardized tests - clear)
4.  He thinks I'm hot?  (HAHAHAHA - um, clear)
5.  This is a new one that hasn't actually happened yet, but, Am I leaking breast milk?  (Quick glance down - clear)

Hmmmmm - all clear on these fronts, and still this dude is staring at me.  So, I slowly turn to him to meet his gaze and realize that he is staring down at my stomach which is doing some crazy rippling motions as honeydew clogs along to some Dutch song in his/her head.  I stop and stare for a few moments, and while I have become quite accustomed to these movements now, I can understand how it might freak out a boy/man with less wordly experiences.  Then, he realizes that I caught him staring.

Boy/Man:  "Um, are you ok?  I mean, is IT ok?"
AK:  "Yeah, it's not trying to eat its way out or anything....yet..."
Boy/Man:  LONG PAUSE "Wait, it can do that?"

Oh Boy/Man, you have so much to learn, and I'm not talking about babies.  Have you ever heard of sarcasm?


xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, Daddy assembled your crib over the weekend.  It is beautiful and makes us SO anxious for your arrival.  Also, I practiced using your Baby Bjorn with a stuffed animal and it only fell out twice.  Of those two falls, I think only one would've been damaging.  I'll just keep practicing....

Puppy Surprise!

Does anyone remember that toy from the early 90s called Puppy Surprise?  Here's the slightly disturbing commercial to refresh your memory:

The basic premise of this toy was that you bought this stuffed dog not knowing how many puppies were all up inside of it.  There could be 2 or 3 or even 4 (or 5, but I don't know anyone who had one that spit out more than 3)!  Why am I bringing this up now you ask?  Simple.  I caught a glimpse of myself in a storefront window the other day, and I thought to myself that I must have more than one baby in that body.  I know there is only one in my womb, but there's a definite possibility, from the looks of things from the outside, that I may be packing a baby in each thigh as well.  Just call me AK Surprise!  Who knows what the doctor is going to pull out of me when he opens up those velcro attachments.  (That is how I'm going to give birth, right?  The doctor will open up the velcro, pull out a clean baby, and close the velcro back up?)

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, tonight is Daddy and I's first labor and delivery class.  Please pray that they don't make us watch any gory videos, and if they do, please pray that I'm able to hold Daddy's eyes open to watch them.  He doesn't do so well with blood and such.  Remember what we say to that, baby?  RUB SOME DIRT ON IT!

Dimples!

Sometimes B and I sit around and talk about what physical features we want squash to inherit from us.  Sometimes it's nice like:

B:  I hope squash has your beautiful smile.
AK:  I hope squash has your eyes and long eyelashes.

Sometimes it's not so nice like:

AK:  I hope to GOSH that squash does not have either of our huge bushy eyebrows.
AK:  I hope that squash has your metabolism.  I mean seriously, you eat all the time and are so skinny.  I think you have a worm.

Something I've always hoped squash would inherit from my side of the family was a cute set of dimples.  That is, until I read what actually causes a dimple this morning.  Did you know that dimples are caused by malfunctioning muscles in the cheek??  It's true because I read it on the internet!  I don't want squash to have malfunctioning cheek muscles!  This explains why I have all this new dimples all over my butt and thighs - malfunctioning muscles in the gluteus maximus and tensor fasciae latae!  Dimples, people - not cellulite, and it is caused by malfunctioning muscles not neapolitan ice cream and doritos!

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, you know I love you, but I have one small favor I need to ask of you.  CAN YOU PLEASE STOP KICKING/PUNCHING ME IN THE RIBS?  Momma is a delicate flower.  Thank you.

Don't know much about History...

Currently I'm taking two classes (Classroom Assessment and a pre-req History class I've been putting off forever) that I need to pass before I can student teach in the Fall.  If either one of them does not go well, my whole plan is totally screwed, and B might (absolutely would) be kind of (very) mad at me.  I feel like I'm functioning at about 75% brain power and 62% motivation, which makes distractions like this one extra dangerous:

Now how am I supposed to analyze children's literature when this sweet face is looking up at me begging to be played with?  Let's just say I didn't accomplish a whole lot today.

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, sometimes it's ok to put things off and end the day with items still left on your to do list.  Sometimes there are puppies that need to be walked and petted or babies that need to be cuddled and kissed.  Priorities, baby - always put love first!  In times like these I remember the picture that used to hang in my childhood bedroom that said "So quiet down cobwebs; Dust go to sleep!  I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep." 

I Heart Chicago!

Yesterday I had one of those "I love my city moments" that bring on the chills (and teary eyes) when I pinch myself and say "Yes, AK, you really do live here!"  B and I often get that feeling when we are driving back into the city after a vacation or long weekend somewhere else.  It's hard to see that skyline against the lake and not get excited about your life.  Yesterday, I was eating my lunch at a table in Potbelly's while a young man softly sang and played a guitar from up in the rafters.  I was reading the Theatre section of a local arts/entertainment newspaper and planning what shows I wanted to see over the next season.  I was geeking out at all of the amazing choices when I looked out the window to notice that it was snowing big beautiful flakes and everyone was walking with their faces turned up to the snow and smiling.  Of course this all put a smile on my face as well, but here's the real kicker.  Across the street in Millennium Park, I see a man pulling a small child on a sled.  Now they're running through the grass kicking up the snow and laughing until the man grabs the small child and throws her up in the air and catches her.  Right on cue, the young man in Potbelly's begins to sing a stripped down version of "Your Song" by Elton John.  It takes every bit of my strength not start ugly happy crying right there at my table.  I keep it together long enough to finish my lunch and escape out into the fresh air where I too turn my face up to the snow and smile.

I know I've expressed concern about raising a baby in the city in the past, but something in my brain and maybe heart just clicked yesterday.  Suddenly, I can't wait to share this amazing city and our life in it with someone else.  It doesn't matter that I didn't grow up here, we'll work through it together.  That seems almost better.  I can't wait for new adventures and explorations in a city that weekly takes my breathe away with the beauty of its people, architecture, and crazy melting pot of cultures.

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, sorry for the semi-serious tone today.  Momma still has her funny/crazy side intact.  In fact, this morning (in 12 degree weather), I almost took Daisy out for a walk without putting any pants on.  That happened after I slept almost 8 hours last night with only 2 trips to the bathroom and one dog having a nightmare that needed calmed down.  Think about what I will or won't be wearing when you come along and wreak havoc on our schedules.  Hopefully you develop an eye for the bizarre early on and can coo "Aw, hell no, Ma" into my ear to keep us from too much public embarrassment.

Triple Tangent Thursday!

As I go about my day to day life, I often jot down ideas for blogs, and then sit down and flesh them out later when I have the time.  Today, I'm just moving forward with writing down three random thoughts/experiences I've had in the past few days without dedicating an entire post to them them because I'm pregnant, and I don't use that excuse enough.

1.  It's SNOWING in Chicago!  Huge beautiful flakes have been coming down since 10 AM, but it's just now beginning to stick.  I love when it snows in Chicago because I get to enjoy it without having to drive in it!  Also, Daisy gets to wear her cute red snow coat and boots, which just gives me the giggles thinking about.  When we put them on her, she gives us that "Moooooommmmm, Daaaaaaddddd" look that I know squash will be throwing our way in the years to come.

2.  MATERNITY UNDERWEAR IS SO BIG AND GROSS!  I finally gave in yesterday and bought some larger maternity clothes to get me through these last 8 weeks.  I took a "what you need to pack for the hospital" list with me to Target just to pick up anything I might not have.  When I got to the maternity underwear line, I was slightly puzzled.  Somehow I had never heard of such a thing.  Don't you just buy bigger underwear?  Anyways, I went to the intimates department and looked around until I found a whole rack of these undergarments and OH, HOT GEEZ, they were disgusting.  Blech - I just can't talk about them anymore.  Blech.

3.  I'm taking one class this quarter to finish up all my credits before student teaching starts in the Fall.  My final class takes place on March 6th.  My due date is March 10th.  Um...awesome.  I may have mentioned this to my professor last night, and she looked at me and dryly said "as long as you don't have that baby in my classroom, we will figure something out."  Later in the class it came across pretty clearly that she doesn't have any kids, she doesn't really like kids, and that theory just for the sake of theorizing is more interesting to her than theory in practice on kids.  I hear you loud and clear, Prof.  I will keep my kid as far away from you and your classroom as possible.  My biggest nightmare has now gone from my water breaking on the train to my water breaking in her presence.

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, last night Daddy made chop suey for dinner.  It was delicious, but I'm pretty sure you did not care for it.  You had the hiccups for almost an hour after I finished eating.  Luckily for you, once you're here and Daddy makes something you don't like, you can just slide it under the table to that living garbage disposal we call Daisy.  She eats everything.

An open letter to the Red Line riders...

Dear Red Line riders:

Last night when I got on the Red Line at the Jackson stop after work, I didn't care that nobody offered me a seat.  My tailbone aches these days, and standing is actually preferable to sitting on those hard train seats.  I did care when a man clearly well into his 70s perhaps close to 80 stepped onto the train and you still didn't budge.  Are you so tired after your 9 to 5 job that you couldn't stand up for just a few more minutes to let this man (who was wearing some sort of Veterans hat by the way) sit down?  I looked around the train in frustration trying to make eye contact with someone else who saw this happen, but all of your noses were buried too deep in your IPhones or Wall Street Journals to have even noticed.  It hurt my heart to see everyone so disconnected from the world around them.  Shame on all of you.

AK

Let's Go Bulls!

On Monday night instead of watching the most boring National Championship ever, we went to squash's first Bulls game versus the Pistons.  Let me just say that while the food was incredibly pregnancy friendly (nachos with as many jalapenos as you want, pretzels, and peanuts!!!), the seats were the absolute worst thing evvvvvver.  Luckily I had an aisle seat so that when the people in our row had to leave for the bathroom or a beer run, I could get my huge belly out of the way.  While the seats were uncomfortable (I"m pretty sure they're uncomfortable even if you're not 8 months pregnant), I was feeling awesome and had a great time.  That's why I was surprised at some of the thinly veiled reactions I received.  Here are just a few.

Reaction #1 (women's bathroom):  After leaving a stall and walking up to the sink to wash my hands, a woman grabs her child and presses them up against the wall to make way for me.  While I know she meant well, it was a little extreme.  It made her look like she either thought her or her daughter might catch "the pregnancy" from me, or that she was afraid I couldn't control my huge body and might fall over on them and suffocate them.

Reaction #2  (walking up the aisle to our seats):  I have never seen so many pity looks in my life!  Yo, people, I can still climb stairs - and there were only 8!  They seemed to be shooting glares at B like he forced me to make this hard long journey to our seats when in reality, I was the one wearing the Bulls hat and already screaming "Noah, get your head in the game!!!"

Reaction #3  (near the bar area):  Disgust.  Girls in thigh high boots with leather leggings and extremely blond hair stare at me like I belong in the beluga whale tank at the zoo.  Sorry if me and my pregnancy hormones stood too close to you and your glass of wine.  By the way, why don't you learn to drink beer - it's a basketball game!

Good for me, the Bulls killed the Pistons (poor B had an awful couple of days in Detroit sports), and we made it safely home without squash offending or worrying anyone else.  Whew, being in public is exhausting!

Daisy wanted to feel squash kicking.

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, we are currently searching for a new apartment.  Everything about it revolves around you.  Is there room for your play mat somewhere in the living room?  How many stairs will we have to carry the stroller up?  Are there any other babies around that we can make your BFFs?  Is there a bar nearby that delivers drinks for those long long nights?  Priorities, baby, get them straight!

Proof that B Has You All Fooled

B:  I had a dream last night that the Lions were playing in the Superbowl and you went into labor.  I didn't know what to do!
AK:  Well, good thing we start our childbirth classes next week, then you'll know where the hospital is and what to do.
B:  No, I meant I didn't know whether to go with you to the hospital or stay and watch the Lions.  I mean they are both once in a lifetime experiences!

I win tonight, B.

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, we are going to try our best to raise you sports neutral and let you pick your favorite teams yourself.  This works for me because I am banking on the fact that living in Chicago will naturally make you a Chicago sports fan.  Daddy will work extra hard to make sure this doesn't happen.  Also, Aunt S and Uncle B will probably be bad influences as well.  If they ever give you something green to wear before you can read, run away.  It is probably a Michigan State shirt and should be burnt.

30 5/7 Weeks - I'm Back!

Does anyone else feel like I've been pregnant for like two years?  How do those African Elephants do it?  Two years without a glass of red wine and a spicy tuna sushi roll?  Wowee.

So, I'm back from my fabulous two week holiday vacation and life is already crazy.  Work started yesterday, class starts tonight, and I barely fit into my maternity clothes anymore.  This morning I took down all of our Christmas decorations.  It always makes me sad in the heart to do this, but our tree was so dead that the ornaments were seriously throwing themselves off of it.  They would rather plummet to their certain death than spend one more minute on that dry fire hazard of a tree. 

This picture is at my parents' house.  That tree in the background was about 12 feet tall and gorgeous!

So.....Christmas.  It really was wonderful.  We visited two states and families (only one puking dog in the car mishap), ate three Christmas dinners, and received more presents than we really deserved.  Squash was a real trooper through the week only sending me to bed once when either a hand or a foot was wedged in my ribcage making breathing pretty difficult.  I think he/she was lulled into a food coma a majority of the time because I was eating everything in sight.  I learned that my big belly is an awesome shelf for bowls of ice cream and bottles of pop (caffeine free only, B!).  I couldn't stop thinking about how next Christmas will be so incredibly different.  Squash will be with us and around nine months old.  We barely had room to bring back just our presents - not sure how we'll manage next year with a backseat full of baby and dog.  I'm sure squash won't get very many presents - there's just NO way that she will be incredibly spoiled ;-) 

Somehow we made it home in one piece and vegged out for three full days on the couch.  We tried to do things that won't be possible once we have a newborn, like watch three movies in a row on Starz stopping only to eat some extremely unhealthy food, sleeping in until 11 AM, and showering only to put our pajamas right back on.  It was amazing.  This was all capped off with our final NYE party where we don't have to worry about finding a babysitter.

Don't worry, Mom, it's only Pellegrino in my wine glass.  I drank the crap out of that sparkling water and somehow made it all the way to midnight without sneaking off to take a nap.  Check out this sweet picture of squash getting his/her first New Years kiss from the Chicago aunts...

Hope everyone's holidays were as fabulous as ours were!  Here's to a happy and healthy 2012 - a year we're sure never to forget!!

xoxo
AK

p.s.  Baby, a dear member of Grandma and Grandpa F's family passed away this week.  Their 15 year old dog, Snickers, is now in doggy heaven probably taking a nap on the back of a chair in the sun.  Here's what I want you to learn from Snickers, baby:  Never give up.  Even if eight people tell you no, keep reaching for that piece of food on the table you really want (or whatever it is that's important in your life- for Snickers that was food).  I hope you love animals as much as your Daddy and I do, baby, they can teach you so much about life that oftentimes humans can't.