Last week I had to go into the doctor's office and spend two hours of my life doing a glucose test. It involved getting my blood drawn three separate times and downing a bottle of the grossest orange liquid ever. (Unfairly, the liquid was the exact color of McDonald's Orange Drink but tasted nothing like that wonderful nectar.) Anyways, during this extended stay, one of the nurses was telling me that pregnant women have amazing immune systems and rarely get the flu or bad colds. I was like that's awesome because it never fails that I get a really bad cold right before or right after the holidays. How great to finally get something out of this pregnancy other than a second chin and the ability to eat an entire sleeve of Ritz crackers with peanut butter.
So, why did I wake up yesterday with the absolute WORST COLD I'VE EVER HAD IN MY LIFE?!?! Where is that nurse when I can't breathe without blowing my nose every three minutes and coughing up stuff that looks exactly like slime from Double Dare? I can't wait to go into that office next week and tell her what I think of her super pregnant immune system idea! That cold was just waiting for me to let down my guard so it could attack!
On the bright side, I've eaten almost an entire super sized bag of Skittles. I'm pretty sure my mom used to say "starve a fever, feed a cold." This cold is going to get fed right out of my body. See ya!
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, Daddy and Daisy are the BEST team of caretakers when you're sick. Daddy makes sure you take your medicine and are eating right, and Daisy snuggles right up next to you all day and smothers you with kisses. It's hard not to feel better after just a few hours of that! I hope you're not in there sneezing - although the thought of that is a little adorable.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Thanks for the double chin, Santa!
This weekend, I had my first baby shower! It was amazing and made me cry. I will spare you the video of my trying to give a thank you speech near the end of the shower where I did not put more than two coherent sentences together. A big SORRY goes out to my Speech Team coach, Mr. Harris, who would've been most disappointed in my attempt to separate my emotions from the content of the speech. It was no 1st Place Tippecanoe County in the 6th Grade Drama Division effort, that's for sure! Oh, Little Matchstick Girl, you were the high point of my competitive speaking career. I digress. So, the shower was beautiful and I've never felt more love toward my little growing family as I did that day. It still is crazy to me how much love you can feel towards someone (eggplant in this case) that you've never even met - who's not even born!
But...(you knew there was a catch right)...I just got around to looking at the photos my wonderful sister-in-law took at the shower, and egad, all those women who were telling me how beautiful I looked must be blind! Like, they must seriously be in need of an eye exam and a stronger glasses or contact prescription STAT because poking out where it wasn't invited in all of these pictures is none other than.....my dreaded double chin. That double chin and I have a long history just like the number on the scale that will not be discussed. Just so this isn't a long post where I whine the entire time again, here is a picture of me practicing to be a mom at the shower holding the most precious little elf of a girl:
You can see double chin rearing it's ugly head in this photo, and also notice how B is not the only one attracted to my larger bosom. Little girl was very interested in holding onto the twins as well! Here's a cute one of the parents to be:
B is sooo cute!!! Ok, cute overload is done. Let's get back to the elephant in the room.
So, basically, I can trace back my obsession with the shape of my face and the number of chins that face has to my father. For those who have met my father, you probably remember his easy smile and laugh, his kindness, and his amazing hugs (seriously, you haven't lived until you've hugged that man!). You also may remember that his head looks a lot like Charlie Brown's in that it's quite round. In fact, the story goes that when my mother told my grandmother that she was marrying my father, my grandmother made a comment about how all of their children would have round heads! Well, grandma, you were only 1/3 correct, as I am the only child that received this blessing. I actually always loved that I shared this characteristic with my father - who wouldn't want to be like him - he's adorable! It's just that for some reason extra weight loves to hang off that pretty much non existent chin of the round faced person.
So, here is my Christmas wish. Extra weight, I have been lucky to see you mostly settle in my belly bump area until now. You are slowly creeping into other places now where you are most unwanted. Please, be directed to my chest area where you were collecting so beautifully before, and leave my little chin alone!
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, you are the size of a two pound rump roast right now! Your nostrils are open and you're practicing taking breaths in and out. You're growing up so fast, and I haven't even met you yet! So far,you seem to prefer the sounds of the nightly news over The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, so your father and I are both overjoyed. Somehow I feel more responsible for the world that we're bringing you into than I did when it was just your daddy and I. We're watching the debates and keeping track of issues that are important to us and having real conversations about what it all means. You are making us smarter, baby, and we love you for that!
But...(you knew there was a catch right)...I just got around to looking at the photos my wonderful sister-in-law took at the shower, and egad, all those women who were telling me how beautiful I looked must be blind! Like, they must seriously be in need of an eye exam and a stronger glasses or contact prescription STAT because poking out where it wasn't invited in all of these pictures is none other than.....my dreaded double chin. That double chin and I have a long history just like the number on the scale that will not be discussed. Just so this isn't a long post where I whine the entire time again, here is a picture of me practicing to be a mom at the shower holding the most precious little elf of a girl:
You can see double chin rearing it's ugly head in this photo, and also notice how B is not the only one attracted to my larger bosom. Little girl was very interested in holding onto the twins as well! Here's a cute one of the parents to be:
B is sooo cute!!! Ok, cute overload is done. Let's get back to the elephant in the room.
So, basically, I can trace back my obsession with the shape of my face and the number of chins that face has to my father. For those who have met my father, you probably remember his easy smile and laugh, his kindness, and his amazing hugs (seriously, you haven't lived until you've hugged that man!). You also may remember that his head looks a lot like Charlie Brown's in that it's quite round. In fact, the story goes that when my mother told my grandmother that she was marrying my father, my grandmother made a comment about how all of their children would have round heads! Well, grandma, you were only 1/3 correct, as I am the only child that received this blessing. I actually always loved that I shared this characteristic with my father - who wouldn't want to be like him - he's adorable! It's just that for some reason extra weight loves to hang off that pretty much non existent chin of the round faced person.
So, here is my Christmas wish. Extra weight, I have been lucky to see you mostly settle in my belly bump area until now. You are slowly creeping into other places now where you are most unwanted. Please, be directed to my chest area where you were collecting so beautifully before, and leave my little chin alone!
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, you are the size of a two pound rump roast right now! Your nostrils are open and you're practicing taking breaths in and out. You're growing up so fast, and I haven't even met you yet! So far,you seem to prefer the sounds of the nightly news over The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, so your father and I are both overjoyed. Somehow I feel more responsible for the world that we're bringing you into than I did when it was just your daddy and I. We're watching the debates and keeping track of issues that are important to us and having real conversations about what it all means. You are making us smarter, baby, and we love you for that!
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
Deck the Two Bedroom Apartment
This really has nothing to do with being pregnant or eggplant at all. I just wanted to show everyone how pretty our apartment looks all decorated for the Season of Lights (check me out being all politically correct and stuff). We bought our tree a block from our place and carried it home. City living at its best and most convenient!
Good thing we're not going to be totally rocking her world by bringing a wrinkly screaming newborn home in a couple of months. Ooops. Sorry, Daisy, hope you enjoy that spot under the table.
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, it's so crazy to think that next Christmas you will be here and you will be 10 months old. I am really glad you came along because I have a pretty good case for buying new stockings since we presently only have two. I don't think that Daddy will share his.
Christmas threw up all over our living room, y'all! In order to put that tree in the corner, we had to move Daisy's dog bed in front of the fireplace. She hasn't stepped paw in it since then. She really doesn't like change....like at all. In fact, here is her solution to change....hiding underneath the dining room table.
Good thing we're not going to be totally rocking her world by bringing a wrinkly screaming newborn home in a couple of months. Ooops. Sorry, Daisy, hope you enjoy that spot under the table.
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, it's so crazy to think that next Christmas you will be here and you will be 10 months old. I am really glad you came along because I have a pretty good case for buying new stockings since we presently only have two. I don't think that Daddy will share his.
Christmastime is the best time for pregnantime!
Being pregnant during the holidays is awesome. You want to know why??
I get to eat all these cookies from the comfort of my stretchy maternity pants. Pregnancy for the win! B and I decorated these cookies a few nights ago, and there are quite a few gone. Here is a cheesy picture that B set up of me putting my "bun in the oven". Please disregard my closed eyes. I was probably laughing and calling B "Daaaaad" like I always do when he suggests something borderline lame.
When we lived in Texas, my girlfriends loved B so much they were always inviting him out for girls nights with us mostly because he was such a dad. He drove us around, told awful jokes, played Bob Seeger too loud, and made sure no creepy guys were bothering us. Eggplant is going to be sooo embarrassed. I can't wait.
B's "dadness" is definitely one of my favorite things about him. I just love that guy. How can you resist this face?
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, there are lots of things that I hope you learn from me. I hope you learn to use your imagination and creativity, I hope you learn to love learning and knowledge, and I hope you learn how important patience and kindness are. But, baby, I REALLY hope you don't learn how to pout from me. If you pout even 1/4 as well as I do, Daddy and I are in trouble. I caught myself pouting the other day about something, and Daddy caved right in. I looked at him and said "uh-oh". Maybe you'll just inherit my huge caterpillar eyebrows instead.
I get to eat all these cookies from the comfort of my stretchy maternity pants. Pregnancy for the win! B and I decorated these cookies a few nights ago, and there are quite a few gone. Here is a cheesy picture that B set up of me putting my "bun in the oven". Please disregard my closed eyes. I was probably laughing and calling B "Daaaaad" like I always do when he suggests something borderline lame.
When we lived in Texas, my girlfriends loved B so much they were always inviting him out for girls nights with us mostly because he was such a dad. He drove us around, told awful jokes, played Bob Seeger too loud, and made sure no creepy guys were bothering us. Eggplant is going to be sooo embarrassed. I can't wait.
B's "dadness" is definitely one of my favorite things about him. I just love that guy. How can you resist this face?
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, there are lots of things that I hope you learn from me. I hope you learn to use your imagination and creativity, I hope you learn to love learning and knowledge, and I hope you learn how important patience and kindness are. But, baby, I REALLY hope you don't learn how to pout from me. If you pout even 1/4 as well as I do, Daddy and I are in trouble. I caught myself pouting the other day about something, and Daddy caved right in. I looked at him and said "uh-oh". Maybe you'll just inherit my huge caterpillar eyebrows instead.
Thursday, December 1, 2011
The Dreaded Number
Yesterday at the doctor's office, I stepped on the scale and instead of looking away like I normally do, I looked right down at those numbers. Guess what was staring right back up at me?! The dreaded number I swore I would never see on a scale on which I was standing ever again. (Of course I'm not going to divulge that number - a lady needs to keep some secrets!)
This number and I go WAY back. We first met midway through my freshman year of college when my poison of choice was the 24hr McDonald's we had in the food court of my boyfriend of the moment's dorm. Oh, how I could take down a double quarter pounder with cheese back then...usually as a late night snack after I'd already had a full dinner and some soft serve ice cream. The second time I met this number was shortly after moving to Chicago after undergrad. Somehow being completely broke and not knowing a single person in the city led to weekends of me eating Chinese food and brownies in bed (full disclosure: I may or may not have cooked those brownies before consumption).
Each time I met that number I somehow managed to put down the cheeseburgers and brownie batter and step away from the kitchen and into the gym. However, here we are at our third meeting, number, and I have no choice but to give into you and accept that you will only grow larger over the next three months. You have won for now, but it's much easier to swallow knowing those extra pounds are little eggplant and not grease and chocolate.
Also, number, watch out once eggplant and I hit the lakefront path with our stroller. Your days will be limited!
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, yesterday I got my hair cut and it looked beautiful - so full of body and shine - I was in love with what my stylist, Cassie, had done! This morning, I woke up and tried to replicate Cassie's work, and honey, it looks like I piled straw on my head in the shape of a mullet. After my arm almost fell off from trying to blow dry it with a round brush, I resorted to the straightening iron. I look sort of like a J. Crew version of Joan Jett. Not good, baby, not good. Let's hope you're a boy, or if you're a girl that you love ponytails with bumps and crooked braids.
This number and I go WAY back. We first met midway through my freshman year of college when my poison of choice was the 24hr McDonald's we had in the food court of my boyfriend of the moment's dorm. Oh, how I could take down a double quarter pounder with cheese back then...usually as a late night snack after I'd already had a full dinner and some soft serve ice cream. The second time I met this number was shortly after moving to Chicago after undergrad. Somehow being completely broke and not knowing a single person in the city led to weekends of me eating Chinese food and brownies in bed (full disclosure: I may or may not have cooked those brownies before consumption).
Each time I met that number I somehow managed to put down the cheeseburgers and brownie batter and step away from the kitchen and into the gym. However, here we are at our third meeting, number, and I have no choice but to give into you and accept that you will only grow larger over the next three months. You have won for now, but it's much easier to swallow knowing those extra pounds are little eggplant and not grease and chocolate.
Also, number, watch out once eggplant and I hit the lakefront path with our stroller. Your days will be limited!
xoxo
AK
p.s. Baby, yesterday I got my hair cut and it looked beautiful - so full of body and shine - I was in love with what my stylist, Cassie, had done! This morning, I woke up and tried to replicate Cassie's work, and honey, it looks like I piled straw on my head in the shape of a mullet. After my arm almost fell off from trying to blow dry it with a round brush, I resorted to the straightening iron. I look sort of like a J. Crew version of Joan Jett. Not good, baby, not good. Let's hope you're a boy, or if you're a girl that you love ponytails with bumps and crooked braids.
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